L: wrestling with what Christ's LORDSHIP (actually) looks like in my life
Lately I’ve been wrestling with the idea of what Christ’s Lordship looks like in my life. It’s not a word we like to throw around these days. Perhaps the only time we hear it is when watching Downton Abbey reruns. The word lordship sounds heavy… hallowed. Its implications are perhaps even a bit scary.
I like what James MacDonald has to say on this topic, “nobody makes Jesus Lord. He is Lord.”
Perhaps it’s one of the reasons why I don’t (like to) actively think about what Christ’s Lordship means in my life… I don’t like being reminded that I’m not in control. Yes, Christ is my Saviour. But do I willingly submit to him as LORD of my life, giving Him full authority? I mean really. Is Christ’s Lordship reflected in my attitudes, my relationships, and how I spend my time and money?
This idea of Christ being Lord of my life runs counterintuitive to everything else out there. We’ve all been encouraged to own the moment. Pull up our socks. Get in the driver’s seat. You know… make stuff happen.
To be honest, I’m scared of absolute surrender (which in my mind, is what Christ’s Lordship is all about). I mean what does that actually look like in my life? I’m not talking about raising your hands and singing a nice song about surrender while at church. And quite frankly, I’m tired of pat answers (so please don’t anyone “Jeremiah 29:11” me (which I believe is far too often taken out of context)). I’m a pessimist, who softens it up by calling myself a realist. My mind automatically goes to the ugliest places of what surrender could look like in my mind and I wonder why I would ever want to voluntarily put myself in a position to go there. But as it turns out, in the depths of my pessimism, I don’t leave room for God’s grace, much less His love.
Natalie Grant’s newest song, King of the World, has been on repeat – in my mind and certainly on my Spotify account. The lyrics match what I’ve been wrestling with as I contemplate what Christ’s Lordship means in my life. (Please) listen here. Grant's lyrics follow below:
I tried to fit you in the walls inside my mind
I try to keep you safely in between the lines
I try to put you in the box that I’ve designed
I try to pull you down so we are eye to eye
When did I forget that you’ve always been King of the World?
I try to take life back right out of the hands of the King of the World
How could I make you so small
When you’re the One who holds it all
When did I forget that you’ve always been the King of the World
Just a whisper of your voice can tame the seas
So who am I to try to take the lead
Still I run ahead and think I’m strong enough
When you’re the one who made me from the dust
When did I forget that you’ve always been King of the World?
I try to take life back right out of the hands of the King of the World
How could I make you so small
When you’re the One who holds it all
When did I forget that you’ve always been King of the World
There's really no "clean" way to end this post (at least I'm coming up short, sorry!). I suppose my intent is to invite you into a conversation about what Christ's Lordship means in your life. I really want to explore this idea more. And if you've got questions about God and if He really IS IN control, well good. I’ve got lots of questions, and I’ve got some doubts too. The thing is, my God is big enough to handle our questions. I firmly believe He wants us to wrestle with these concepts rather than not acknowledge them at all. I am confident the King of the World is big enough to handle it.